Thursday, July 06, 2006

The Evil Empire Strikes Again

Um. Yeah. So, six weeks after our general manager was unceremoniously turfed out the door, we all got called into the main boardroom again.

"This is it," I said. "We're getting canned."

So, yeah, you joke about it and you might have even seen it coming, but when El Presidente started things off with, "Unfortunately..."

I wanted to just get up and say, "Excuse me" so that I could do the following:
1. Start looking for jobs
2. Raid the supply closet
3. Destroy some furniture
4. Grab something sharp to gouge somebody's eyes out

El Presidente was roaming the corridors this morning --- which is never a good thing, 'cause frankly, I wasn't even aware we had a president until six weeks ago when we were all called in and it was announced that our GM was out and a big strapping old Irish guy who has the same name as a former Dallas star was in.

I mean, he was never ever here.

Oh, and the red-haired, pinchy faced bitch from HR was eagerly nipping at his heels, which is an even worse thing, 'cause the sole purpose of red-haired, pinchy-faced bitch's existence is to be there when divisions are put under.

She stands there in the corner, with her thick arms folded across her square chest as she tries to muster some false sense of empathy.

I later joked that, it would have been funny if we'd all just started screaming --- not words so much as high-pitched animal noises --- and lunged at the senior management team like a pack of hyenas...you know, so it'd be more obvious how fucking angry we were at this bullshit.

'Cause that's what this all is. It's bullshit.

Especially when Dallas Star goes, "We're in this together."

This would have been a good moment to stand up, jabbing a finger at him and screaming, "HORSESHIT! We're not in this together. There's you and then there's me."

All this shit about how we have to stick together and still work under the same level of efficiency and professionalism that we always have was just...ugh. As far as I'm concerned, we're all rats on a sinking ship and I owe not even a drop of loyalty to anybody.

You've got to look out for number one.

And you know what else? Don't bloody tell me that you're sad or upset about having to do this to us, 'cause this morning, the old boys club was roaring with laughter behind the GM's office door.

So...the rationale behind all of this is that the Evil Empire (which, by the way, took over the last company I worked at) has also taken over this company and they don't see us as "viable" anymore.

Whatever.

Why'd they have to tell us this today? The least they could have done was wait until tomorrow and then sent us all home to recuperate. Less chance of one of us showing up to work tomorrow with a machine gun.

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